Friday, September 16, 2011

Alone time....

I've been living in a hotel for the past two weeks... It feels like forever.... But lets take things from the beginning!

I was supposed to move to Kingston Upon Thames (UK) for a master's degree, on psychology.
And so I did. I left home, to pursue my dream of becoming a psychologist, finally..
I came to Kingston with my mum, she wanted to help me with all my stuff, my luggage, etc.
So we booked a hotel for 10 days, in order to househunt for a house (to share with other students) or a room (to share with a family, something a lot of people do here). Anyway, after a lot of NO's and a lot of laughing behind our backs from estate agents, we got squat. And then something crazy happend, and I found a place! To keep the story short, we couldn't move in right away, so I had to stay more days at the hotel. Thankfully they had a single room, although they were fully booked. But I can stay here until Sunday, when I move in the new place :)
I'll have to live there for a year. My masters is a year long, but I think I'll need to stay longer, to get my license and to register with the british psyclological society. I like the house though :p

My mum flew back home yesterday, and I've been alone since that. It feels a bit awkward, but I think I'm fine. At least now I can get some quiet time!

I meet new people everyday, and I like that, but sometimes it seems I'm using all my energy just to seem nice and calm and agreable. And I don't like that. All this stress, all the presure of doing everything right, finding a place, finding roommates, etc, it has taken it's toll on me. I feel spent and lonely.
My lovely boyfriend isn't with me, he is back home in Russia, studying (to be a psychologist too, what an irony). I miss him so much, it's insane. Everything I see and feel, I'd like to share it with him. But we are so far from eachother..
These days I feel like I can't even help myself, much rather the others :/  It feels impossible to get out of  bed each morning. I hate the fact that I kinda like it here and can only feel half of it, because he isn't with me here...



(Danni and Kyrill, 3-3-2011, at a close friend's house)

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